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How to catch a Lion in the Desert?

Here is a list of various scientific methods of approaching the problem.

1)THE NEWTONIAN METHOD: Let the lion catch you (let s assume you remain alive here). For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. You will have captured the lion.

2) THE EINSTEIN METHOD: Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion. The relative velocity makes the lion run faster and hence he feels heavier
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Wedding speech from modern girl to her in laws:

My dear new family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new house...

Firstly I must tell you that my presence here should not change your life routines...

Those who used to do the laundry must keep on doing it... Those cooking must keep cooking... Those cleaning must keep cleaning... I'll not disturb anybody's routine...

So far as I'm concerned, I'm here only to:
Eat BUN,
Have FUN and
Entertain yiur SON!!!
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The other day my neighbor, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy! I didn't know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, 'What the heck,', and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

She said, "I have some really great news!"

I said, "Great. Tell me why you're so happy."
She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, told me that she was pregnant.

I knew she'd been trying
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"So tell me, Mrs. Smith," asked the interviewer, "do you have any other skills you think might be worth mentioning?"

"Well, actually, yes," said the applicant modestly. "Last year I had two short stories published in national magazines, and I also finished my novel."

"Very impressive," commented the interviewer, "but I was thinking of skills you could apply during office hours."

Mrs. Smith explained brightly, "Oh, that was during office hours."
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When a man died, his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea.

No sooner were the papers delivered than a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, "You know very well that he died of diarrhea, not gonorrhea."
Replied the widow, "I nursed him night and day so of course I knew he died of diarrhea. But I thought it would be better for posterity to remember him as a great lover rather than the big shit he always was."
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John was talking to his fiance, Rebecca.

He said, "Be honest, now, baby. How am I as a lover?"

To which she replied, "Honey, I would definitely say that you're warm."

"Really?" he said excitedly.

"Yes, in fact I would say that you're the dictionary definition of the word 'warm'."

John was pleased until he went home and, just for fun, checked his dictionary and found, "WARM: Not so hot."
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More Articles ...

  1. Job Interview!
  2. Drive Slow!!
  3. Habitual Drinker

Sardarji Article Count: 1049

Political Article Count: 73

Women Article Count: 22

Thief Article Count: 18

Professor Article Count: 8

General Article Count: 1988

Non-Veg Jokes Article Count: 24

Kids Article Count: 413

Bollywood Article Count: 9

Doctor Patient Article Count: 289

Husband-Wife Article Count: 789

Religion Article Count: 173

Lawyers Article Count: 147

Blondes Article Count: 126

Bar Article Count: 127

Animal Kingdom Article Count: 70

Communities Article Count: 67

Sports Article Count: 80

Techies Article Count: 66

Celebrities Article Count: 42

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